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4061. Chicken launcher

The US Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) has developed a unique device for testing the strength of windshields on airplanes. The device is a gun that launches a dead chicken at a plane’s windshield at approximately the speed the plane flies. The theory is that if the windshield doesn’t crack from the carcass impact, it’ll survive a real collision with a bird during flight. The British Airway was very interested in this device and wanted to test a windshield on its brand new, speedy airliner. The BA’s engineers borrowed the FAA’s chicken launcher and they loaded a dead chicken and fired. The ballistic chicken shattered the windshield and it went through the captain’s seat, broke an instrument panel and embedded itself in the wall of the cockpit. The BA engineers were stunned and asked the FAA to recheck the test to see if everything was done correctly. The FAA reviewed the test thoroughly and had one recommendation: "Use a thawed chicken."

4061. 鳥発射機



4062. Don’t serve spirits

What happened when a ghost asked for a glass of gin at a local pub? The bartender said "Sorry, we don’t serve spirits."

4062. アルコールは出さない


4063. Pictures! Pictures!

A communist party lecturer visited a small village in the Soviet Union and ordered all the villagers to gather in the village club to listen to his lecture.
Lecturer: Love can be between a man and a woman.
Villagers: Show us pictures! Pictures!
Lecturer: Also love can be between a man and a man.
Villagers: Pictures! Pictures!
Lecturer: Besides love can be between a woman and a woman.
Villagers: Pictures! Pictures!
Lecturer: And finally, love can be between you and your country, Soviet Union. Okay now, here are pictures!
There was a perfect silence in the room…..

4063. 写真!写真!


4064. Sumo wrestler

Three men, a Scot, and an English man and a Japanese sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building. The Scot jumped off and shouted ''God save Scotland!'' The English man jumped off and shouted ''God Save the Queen!'' The Sumo wrestler jumped off and shouted ''God save the person who I land on!''

4064. 相撲取り


4065. Race

Bill: Where did you get that gold watch Joe?
Joe: I won it in a race.
Bill: How many people participated in it?
Joe: Three, a policeman, the owner of the watch, and me!!

4065. 競争



4066. Over 2,000 years old

A Norwegian went to a museum. The tour guide was explaining: "This sword is over 2000 years old." The Norwegian paused for a second to think about it and then asked: "How is that possible? We are only in the year 1998."

4066. 2000年以上昔


4067. Out of nowhere

A man approached the very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and asked, "Excuse me, Miss. I've lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?" "Why?" "Because every time I talk to a beautiful woman, my wife appears out of nowhere."

4067. どこからともなく


4068. Price tag

A man was sitting at an interview in his new suit, looking his very best. As he put his hands down, his interviewer noticed the price tag was still attached to the sleeve. Noticing the interviewer’s perplexing eyeshot, the man said, "Well, you know, at least I can take the suit back if I don't get the job.”

4068. 値札


Kaz's BOOK STOREへ 英語のジョーク表紙へ
Mail Kaz for Other Jokes Archives(旧作一覧)